Heard from work

This title will be any calls that I receive that I find amusing or strange. I will not give names of customers or techs to save them the embarrassment and for the safety of law suits.
*Beep*
Me: Thank you for calling ATM Network Support
Customer (upset): Yes I just used your ATM and it captured my card.
M: Ok did it give you your cash or a receipt?
C: Yes i received both.
M: Ok on the receipt there should be an ATM ID please read it off to me.

(ID given and information brought up)

M: Ok what you will need to do is contact the card provider and have them issue you a new card.
C: No, you have to get this card out of the ATM this is my mother's card.
M: It is who's card?
C: My mother's and she doesn't know that I have it.

Some days it doesn't pay to steal.

The only surving crew member is ...

Nero. Well not really. As some of you may know that I am taking things from the BBC show "Red Dwarf"and using it for titles. If you don't know the show about Dave Lister the only human alive on a ship call Red Dwarf, hence the name. The show starts out by introducing the crew members and their roles to what goes on in the show.
What has happened. During a radiation leak the entire crew was wiped out except for Dave Lister, a bum the lowest ranking man or being on the ship and had no goal in life until joining up. ArnoldJ. Rimmer, A hologram of a second tech with high hopes of becoming an officer but has failed 11 times running due to being mad with power and being a complete and total Smeg Head. Cat, thats right a cat but this cat doesn't just slink along his wardrobe would make your mother think she is conservative. Holly, the ship's computer with an I.Q. of 6000 which is the same I.Q. of 6000 P.E. teacher. Later the crew picks up Kryten, a series 3000 mechanode programed to clean but has been able to break his programing with help from Lister and is able to become more human. Kristine Kochanski, Navigation officer who Lister is in love with but can never seem to get his true feeling out for her.
If you ever get the chance and you like British comedies grab these!

This is an SOS from the mining ship...

Hello and welcome to "Gunmen of the Apocalypse." I usually go by the name Nero but am also known in other websites and forums as Nero45 (the 45 will be self explanatory later) and knightrider4545.
Now some may ask: "Why Gunmen of the Apocalypse?" Good question. This title fill all the things that I love. God, guns, westerns, suspense, computers, and last but not least Red Dwarf. The only things that it doesn't fill is humor unless you count some of the funner westerns.
So welcome again and enjoy your stay Pilgrim.